i've spent the past year obsessing, trying to "fix" something that can't be fixed.
in the process of trying to become someone else, i've really lost the old me.
i'm now going to try to "fix" myself.
and no, i don't care that it sounds selfish -noone wants to be around someone who is as sour as i've become.
i was a great person before this year happened.
this year's made me a bit of a poop.
(a really, really, really smelly poop)
the past month or so has been really great. but once again, i've gone and been lame. gosh, i hate it when i turn lame.
so yeah, i'm going to just stop being such a spoilt brat and enjoy the time i have left with you +my other friends because (despite the shit that's happened over this past year) i want you guys to remember me like i've been before this year started.
i'm going to start living each day like it's a new one (which, it is XD) and stop worrying about the past and future and just live in the here and now.
x.
3 thoughts:
It's not selfish to focus on yourself. We can't really help the people that matter in our lives unless we take care of ourselves first. It's like those instructions they give on airplanes. When those oxygen masks drop, you should put your own mask on first before assisting your child.
Anyway, good luck fixing yourself. I'll leave you with a quote from baseball great Satchel Paige:
"Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you."
I can totally relate to this! I think we can all learn to live each day to its fullest and not waste our time thinking about things we have no control over.
By the way you're the farthest thing from a smelly poop!
for what it's worth, an error in judgement does not "a smelly poop" make.
having said that, i hope that new leaf is easy to turn :)
love.
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